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Why should you join?

Will it get you into heaven? No. Will it keep you out of hell? No.

Membership gets you a few things:

  1. You can take part in crafting a new religion. The Church of No, Thanks has some basic ideas already set forth, but it is set up kind of like an Open Source software project. As the founder and maintainer of The Church, I, PastorJulio, am the final arbiter of what is officially part of The Church and what is not, like Linus Torvalds is in the Linux kernel community, but you, as a Member can have a say. This is the complete opposite of what you see in virtually all other religions. With them, you get a clergyman or mystic, and his (or her) word on what the god or gods of that religion wants for and from you is pretty much final. Since The Church of No, Thanks doesn't officially acknowledge gods, and positively advocates for Personal Liberty and Personal Responsibility, It is The Church's official position that you, the individual Member, are in charge of your morals, your beliefs, your decisions, your life and your destiny. The Church's purpose is to offer a community setting where Members can share insights, advice and support with an eye on improving their own lives, the lives of other Members and the cooperative and respectful spirit of all communities everywhere. You can be an active and influential part of that.
  2. A sense of community. People who characterize themselves as Freethinkers often find themselves feeling "on the outside" of common community activities. The Church of No, Thanks invites Freethinkers, atheists, agnostics, "Brights", Secular Humanists, and, everyone else to be part of something we can all work toward and benefit from: a community of open-minded, thoughtful, and helpful individuals promoting Personal Liberty and Personal Responsibility in themselves, in each other, and in the greater community.
  3. We have fudge. While other religions try to tempt you with bland cardboard "hosts", our Communion involves yummy fudge.
  4. One word: Swag. The first 20 new, active Members to complete 25 relevant and substantial forum posts prior to the beginning of NoThanksGiving, 2009 (23:59:59 GMT, May 25, 2009) will receive a free CoNT T-Shirt or Tote Bag (your choice, subject to availability) and elevation to the "Clergy" role on the site. Forum post relevance and substance will be judged solely by PastorJulio. Judgments are final. Winners will be notified via e-mail by June 1, 2009. Offer open to residents of the Continental United States of America, age 18 years, or older, who create an account on this site on or after December 15, 2008. Offer may be withdrawn at any time with our without cause or notice. No purchase necessary. Void where prohibited. Winners are responsible for any and all taxes, duties, tariffs, et cetera. In the event listed prizes are no longer available at the time of the end of the contest, comparable replacement prizes will be selected by PastorJulio and offered to winners.

Click here to start your registration process. It's free... and it's freeing ;)